... Thank You! ...

Thanks to all who participated in my homework! It was greatly appreciated! I recieved 100/100!!
Love,
♥Alex♥

...What is Love?...

Being a newlywed (somewhat. 1 year 3 months! =D) I thought it was only fit to have at least one post discussing such a fantastic question:

WHAT IS LOVE?

How do you define something such as love? Especially as you walk around during the day i can almost guarantee you hear a sentence similar to this at least 20 times: "I LOOOOVE _________." Right? The blank has answers that range from "the park", "my dog", "butterfingers", "rainbows", "taking hot showers", "my sister", "my husband", "my puppies", etc., etc. Yes? So, again I ask, how do you define something so broad?

To give you my definition I feel i need to define not just love, but the different kinds of love I think i have in my life. Here goes:

1st. I LOVE my husband.
Love, as a definition pertaining to my husband, is first the deepest friendship i've ever had. I know I can tell him anything and everything without any fear of being unfairly judged. Second it is and accountability. We, because we love each other, choose to be accountable to each other. This means we know niether of us are perfect. Do we dwell on imperfections? I would be a fool to say no. Of couse sometimes we do. I would then be, in my opinion, an even greater fool to say we love each other inspite of our flaws. I think it is better put that we love each other enough to push each other, day by day, to do better than the day before. I think love is recognizing those short comings together and working as one to always strive to do better. Next, love, with my husband, is the yearning and excitement to share everything of myself with him. Everything that no one else is privledged to get to share :D.

2nd. I LOOOVE my family.
I can, without ease, tell anyone who asks that my family are my very best friends. Second only to my husband. Love with my family a feeling of belonging. Love here is a feeling of acceptance of ones true individual self. All those silly quirks and annoying habits that are apart of you they love because it is you. Who could know me better than people I have spent 22 years with?

I know these are brief, and somewhat inadequate definitions. Like I said earlier how can you really define something such as love. So I now throw it out to you.

How do you define Love? Does it have to vary from each person, place, or object? Could you have one definition for everytime you chose to use the word love?

Love (=D),
♥ Alex ♥

...Sexual Orientation...

Today as I was driving down main street of a very small town close to where I live I was shocked to glance out and see two high school boys holding, seriously - not just making fun, hands and then share a quick peck. Because i have grown up in a small town I do use the word shocked. This is NOT something I'm used to seeing! So my thought today is this:

What determines sexual orientation? What are your thoughts?

Lets start with a definition of what sexual orientation even is. Sexual Orientation, defined per my text book, states this: "The gender(s) that a person is attracted to emotionally, physically, sexually, and romantically."

As I was studying this chapter I found it very interesting the different theories theorist have about what determines a persons sexual orientation. The theories went as follows:

1. Biological: theorist that believe this basically believe that homosexuals are actually different physically the heterosexuals.

2. Developmental: theorist that believe this believe that homosexuality first, there is nothing different physically between homosexuals and heterosexuals, and second homosexualtiy develops as a result of the way they were brought up and in response to their personal history.

3.Learning: theorist that beleive this theory explore how homosexuality is a learned behavior.

4.Sociological: theorist that believe this look at how social forces produce homosexuality in a society

5.Interactional: theoriest that believe this theory look at the interaction between biology, development, and societal factors.

What are your thoughts? Which do you think determines a persons sexual orientation?

Because I haven't studied these theories thouroughly I don't feel I could give an great educated representation of myself and my beliefs. But, if i had to choose I would say either Interactional or, along the same lines, a combination of a few of them.

Thank you so much for all of your assistance!

Love,

♥Alex♥

...Sexual Predators...

So my thought for today comes from a, hmmm i don't even know how to put this, ironic/sad/creepy/you decide story. In my human sexuality class there is this boy. He is very akward to me. Not just awkward weird, but awkward creep me out awkward. Every since the beginning of class i've always told Nick there is something "off" about him. Nick agreed. Sometimes his girlfriend would come to class with him. The way he touched her made my skin crawl. Without fail he would always compliment our teacher every single class period. This wouldn't be extremely awkward as our teacher is a beautiful, intelligent, talented woman (brown nosing? Maybe. Telling the truth? Always.) BUT the way he went about it was, again, very different. Something about it made me cringe when he would open his mouth. Well I was laying in bed with my honey, me passed out (6:00am cheer practices do that to a girl) and him watching the news, and he all of a sudden starts yelling "Al, Al you've got to wak up! Look at this! Hurry, look!" I jump up, obviously startled, and try to orient myself. As soon as i can actually figure out where i'm even at Nick directs my attention to the TV. Lo and behold there is a picture on the news of a man who was charged with two sexual assaults on our very own Utah Valley University campus. Who you ask? You guessesed it. My classmate.

So with that i'm just going to pose some short quick questions:

How do we protect ourselves, and later in life our children, from these people that may seek to hurt them?

Why did I always feel so creeped out by him? Intuition? Or unfair judgement?

How do we "righteously" judge to protect ourselves and those we love?

Thank you for all who are participating in my homework with me! You're fantastic! Here are some statistics about sexual predators from my book to end this post:

"Why do people rape?
There are several theories as to why rape exists in our society. Feminists argue that the nature of the relationships between the sexes fosters rape. Others argues that it exists because of the rapist's psychopathology. Still others claim it is because of how women dress, act, or behave. Today most theorists agree that rape is a crime of power in which sex is used as a weapon."

Sexuality Now: Embracing Diversity. Janell L. Carrol. pg. 479

What do you think?

What is Sexual Assault?

"Sexual Assault is defined as any type of sexual contact or behavior that occurs without the consent of the recipient of the unwanted sexual activity.

Sexuality Now: Embracing Diversity. Janell L. Carrol pg. 480

Things that are included in sexual assault:

• Unwanted penetration
• Forced oral sex
• Masturbation
• Touching
• Fondiling
• Kissing
• Forcing someone to view sexually explicit materials, such as pornography.

Thank you again for all your help!

Loves,

♥Alex♥

...Childhood and Sexuality...

So I'm sitting at the Elementary school i work at waiting for my next class to come and i thought "What better to do then my blog homework that i have been really slacking on? BINGO!" I wish i were at home and actually had my Human Sexuality book to be a little more legit and less cutesy blogger-ish for the topic today, but Eh, what can you do?


Anyway. Working at an elementary school part of my job is one recess duty. It's one of the funnest parts of my day (well except for when it's raining or snowing. Really? Recess. Come on!). You would not beleive some of the things I get to see. Today a family friends little boy, who is in fourth grade, came up to me and we had a cute little chat. He told me all about his teacher that no one likes, but he does, and other things he really didn't like at school. Then, right before he was about to leave, he said "Wanna know the only reason I really like coming to school?" Well of course I did! He then proceeded to say "Because of that girl right there (as he pointed). I have a crush on her. She's so pretty." I then joked a little with him and then recess was over.


I remember a few of our lessons being on Childhood and Adolescent Sexuality. Being "new" to this Human Sexuality concept (well of couse i'm not "NEW" to it, but before the class i'd never taken the time to even think about a lot of these subjects. This is what i mean by "new".) this specific lesson was very interesting to me. It never occured to me to even think about the different things through out childhood that we go through pertaining to sexuality. Because of being in an elementary school I want to focus on the things we learned about that happen in the 6-12 years of age stage.


Do you remember your first crush? I sure do. I was the type of girl that grew up in a family where we played sports. Of couse i noticed those boys. Why? Because they were my competition in who was the fastest or best. You name it? Cute, now, was not something I even thought about. Not until i was in 5th grade. All of my girlfriends weren't very sportsy like me. Most had older sisters that they learned traits, pertaining to boys, from. Kevin Vincent was his name. EVERY girl who had her head on straight could CLEARLY see he was sooooooo HOT. When the whole Kevin shenanigans began i remember hardly being able to comprehend what they were talking about. Hot? What? He's really fast that's for sure! I haven't been able to beat him. Maybe thats what they meant? And then.... It was like a switch was switched on inside of me. Gosh, that bum-part hair do he had. That pretty cool. And oh his smile. When he smiled at me, or any girl in the school, it made all the other girls jealous, and not only that i felt so funny inside! This had to be the meaning of Hot. Right? After this incident my parents were doomed. From that time on I remember being very into boys. In my group of friends from about 8th grade on I was considered the "flirtatious" one. I parenthesize this only because to me it was "friendly" :D. I now watch the students I teacher and can't help but think something they experience in this stage will shape their sexuality in some way or another. Freud believed that children enter a period in childhood when sexual issues remain unimportant, most researchers disagree with that perspective, as do I.


What do you think?


Now, more importantly than just discussing what we go through at different stages in our life I think it was absolutely great that our teacher discussed with us what should and shouldn't be taught at different stages of childrens life, pertaining to sexuality.


Sex, in my home, was NOT discussed. If ,even somewhat, passionate kissing was on the TV the channel was changed. Now, before I go further let me just state a few things. I believe everyone has their choice to choose, regardless what you have been taught. Meaning, because my parents did not choose to discuss these issues in my house that was their choice for teaching their children about sexuality. That is perfectly fine. It was my choice, and mine alone, to choose some of the situations i did later in life because of what i understood, from what i was taught in my home, about sexuality. BUT I chose them. No one has the power to take away my choice. That has always been mine, and mine alone. I will NOT blame my choices on my parents choices on how to teach their children.


Do we have that right? To blame our parents because of their teaching styles? What do you think?


What do you think, from the ages of 5 to 12, should be taught about sexuality? I, clearly, have seen that it is already something they are starting to be aware of. So, as parents (when that gift is bestowed upon us), what do we need to make sure to discuss and make our children aware of, pertaining to sexuality, at such a young tender age?


Lots and lots more posts to come (I have 17 more to do before Saturday. Gosh i'm so expert at procrastination.)! Don't forget to come back and visit me!


If you see something, pertaining to human sexuality, that you want to mention or have me get posted so we can all (3 of us i think =D) talk about it, let me know! I'd love feedback!


Love,
♥Alex♥

... Prostitution ...

Ok. Here we go. BUT before we start i see some of you have participated in my poll but not commented!!!! Don't do this to me! Please share your wisdom and participate in "Get Alex a good grade" project! Pleeeease?


Anyway. Now here's my disclaimer to this post. First let me explain why i chose it. In our class we had to do a group presentation on a topic of our choice. I was with my husband and another guy. We chose Sex Trafficking and Prostitution. There were some things we researched, and some comments made that, not necissarily, got my mind really going, but made me stop to think a little. Other than my research for my powerpoint i have not scoured this topic. I am NOT an expert. I don't know that i even have a solid opinion for myself. I am merely JUST throwing out some thoughts that have been on my mind since Saturday. Comprendo? Please please please leave your comments, but PLEASE don't scream at me and think i am a terrible person. I DO NOT fully agree with every thought i will be throwing out. Oh goody. Lets go.


Now, everyone has biased towards the thought of prostitution, prostitution itself, and prostitutes. I can see you shaking your head right now thinking "Oh no, not I. I would never judge." Stop. I do, you do, i'm sure we all somewhat do, but now i'm speaking for someone other than myself (the only person i can truly speak for) so if you don't GOOD FOR YOU! Moving on. I did. I do. The thought of the act, and person(s) involved just, i don't know quite how to put it, quite litterally makes me want to throw up. When i hear the word prostitute i don't think of Pretty Women all "gussied" up and becoming a lady. No. Who really does? I think of other movies/tv shows i've seen. Intervention. Anyone heard of it? Crack addict, scrawny, nasty women is the biased i have. Wrong? Maybe not. One statistic we found claims that over 90% of women in both street and off-street activities increased their drug or alcohol usage during prostitution.


What, then, you ask, changed my bias (every so slightly) about these women AND men? These statistics:


*The average age of entry into prostitution is from 12-16. 12-16! Really? How many of you out there, at 12 years old, would truly FULLY understand what you were getting yourself into?


*Many girls are started into prostitution because of a pimp scouting them out and coercing them into it. We watched a clip from a document of two pimps who started home videoing their "job" thinking they would someday have a cable television show{PIGS}. The opeing scene? One pimp stating to the camera "Gunna go fin' me sum bitch ho to make me sum money." Hmmmm.... Real winner right there {PIG}. They then stop, no stalk is a better word, a, yes you guess it, TWELVE year old girl. They flirt with her and tell her "she's sure got a thang going on", they're 29 mind you {PIGS}. One pimp then, for the next two weeks, completely "woo's" this girl, gosh they sure are good. After two weeks he tells her his job AND if she loves him she will go out and make more money for them. Hmmmmmmm.......


*57% of Prostitutes were abused as children.


*When asked if they would leave prostitution if they could 90% of them said YES.

Does it not, reading some of these statistics, seem that these individuals may somewhat be unstable? Do we as a society have the accountability to take care of, assist, and protect these individuals? Maybe. Maybe not.

The last thought i guess i want to throw out is in relation to my post. Any of you that put yes i would really like to hear an explanation if you feel comfortable. I'm hoping it wasn't just to be funny.... The end of our presentation, and our class, my teacher closed with the thought that she believes prostitution should be legal. Why? Not because she likes the act anymore than i do. No she believes that (and Professor if i am misrepresenting you i deeply apologize! feel free to comment and set me straight) in legalizing prostituion if will create some regulation and protection for all those that choose to participate. She believes as such drug usage would also go down. Interesting, yes? I thought so.

Anyway. If you made it this far thank you for reading AND commenting ;D It really is greatly appreciated!

Love,
♥Alex♥

... Communication ...

First day, we'll start with something easy. Or somewhat easy.


One of my first papers in class we had to write on was this:


Personal communication strengths and weaknesses and how it affects my relationships on all levels.


So now i'm asking you the same thing. What are your communication strenths and weaknesses? What kind of relationship are you in?


Mine go as follows:


Lets start with a strength. I feel i have a strong strength in being able to express my feelings well. It seems if i'm feeling it inside it's not long before it "bursts" out of me. Its not very often you don't know what i'm thinking.
Now onto my weakness (sticking to just one of both as to not bore you). My weakness related to this strength is the way I express my feelings. I have been told many times that I have a way with expressing myself. Sometimes good, many times not. Often times I become very selfish and my wants are easily placed over the wants or needs of others. I am very "talented", if we'd like to call it talent, at persuading people to my view, or even forcing it on them. This could be viewed as both a weakness and strength. I have found that most times this “talent” I have, when used in personal, family, and friend relationships, almost always proved to be a weakness. My wants, my needs, and my goals, using this “talent”, are always placed before the other individual or group. I become very passionate about “my side” and honestly believe there is no other way. Sadly, at the cost of anyone else involved, I resort to any tactic I have to so I ensure that I win, if you will. Before I met my husband and was dating in college this way of communication seemed very prevalent. It always seemed to work in the beginning of relationships. My “passionate” nature about things I believe, in the beginning, came off as driven, ambitious, ect. It didn’t take long before my new friends would start to fade. Who likes to constantly be manipulated or convinced that their ways, ideas, opinions, and thoughts are never the “right” ones? Luckily, for my sake, communication is a big topic around my house. I can’t say I’ve completely improved in this area, but I started to look at how that may be making those around me feel. When I dated I tried to listen to their thoughts, their ideas, their opinions and not only that but also have an open mind to what they were communicating to me. I slowly found not only did I start to have better, more meaningful relationships, but I started to learn more about myself and my opinions, or ideas, that I always assumed were right. This change, although small still, I believe, assisted me in obtaining the relationship with the person who quickly became my best friend, and later my husband.


So there you have it. Day one of Sexuality in the life of Alex. =D Can't wait to hear all of your thoughts! In commenting if you'd like to leave a topic you think may be interesting to discuss that would be greatly appreciated! Thank you in advance for assisting me with the assignment!


Love,
♥ Alex ♥

... Welcome ...

Hello! I'm Alex.

First let me thank you for even taking a minute to come to this blog. The more of you that stop by the better my grade becomes (well lets hope!).


I am currently taking the course Human Sexuality at Utah Valley University. For one of my last projects I created this blog. I will, for the next twenty days, observe what i see around me relating to Human Sexuality. I'm hoping for it to spark some discussion. That's where YOU come in! Please, please, please comment. You only have twenty days to get your opinions out! In commenting please understand i WILL be using any comments on my final project. If you are uncomfortable with your name being shown DON'T FRET and please still comment, just do it annonymously.

Thank you immensely for visiting! Hope to see you come back again!

Sincerely,

Alex Judson